error: o.per.a.tor (drugstore c o w b o y ;)

Stuffing his hands unwillingly in his pocket, pupils dilated and a dorky grin settled on the boys face. It was yet another addiction run day to Jeremy Bosko-Belo. The night he had been home before midnight, had dinner with his family, passed the peas and dalt and all that. He'd gotten along with his step-siblings, and sat at the bar all night staring at newspapers, looking for a job. He'd gone to bed at near midnight, gotten up at eight. Come out, shared breakfast with his father and step-mother, looking in the days newspaper for a job. All had seemed quite simple and complex at once, and pleasurable for the first time since he;d moved into the same home as Norma Belo.

But as the writers say, good things never last. Almost immediately after dinner him and his step-mother had again argued. "Jeremy, dear, have you been to any interview recentl;y" She asked him with a sly smirk on her face, as if no one would notice the question had ever been spoken. There with a windy presence, gone in moments. "No, I'm still looking." that's where the rant started. On and on about his laziness, about how he would be able to work if he went back to school and got some kind of degree, how he needed a haircut. That got monotaneous after a bit. Yet she still went on, and Samuel sat staring at the days front page story sipping his coffee. Then it was a different story, his need for an apartment, and that's where Jeremy was to shot back, about how he only tried to help, he took care of his siblings. She would not hear of it, finally taking a wrong step. "I'm there mother now, they do not need you to take care of them." Appaled at her underhandingly saying she had replaced their mother, a job no one could ever take.

Slipping on his Pumas and grabbing his hoodie from the coat hook he slammed the front door and left. That was how JEremy was, he didn't face his problems, he walked away from them. Sometimes good, other not, he didn't talk about things, merely acted like they didn't happen. Shrugged them off and went to get high. Soon after he slunk an alley, did a line of coke, and walked away with no regrets at all. More from the fact that now all his problems were gone, for the time that the drug lasted at least, and it was long enough for him to have some kind of free rein right?

Pushing the blonde hair back from his eyes, staring down the street. His feet stopped as a green light caught him and no matter how high he may be, he wasn't going to play in traffic. Pressing the button on the crosswalk sign he leaned his shoulder against it, breifly closing his eyes while his head fell against it. A sigh of releif catching his lips. His footing was a bit precarious, and his eyes opened once more as the traffic slightly slowed to a trickle. Going to move again before a car quite rudely sped past the pane in front of him that had been empty, cutting the red light as if it was merely a suggestion.

"Screw that" Apparently that had given him little intrigue on trying again. Turning on his heel he headed down the sidewalk, headed toward the way the car had come. Oddly enough he could not recall where his Mustang was, pretty sure it was still sitting in his garage though, not bothering to look for his keys before he made the dramatic exit. His hair was messy and touselled, his shorts wrinkled, boxers hanging out slightly beneath his hoddie. The hoddie a tan brown to match the shorts, a purchase of a nearby Hollister Co. Such a rich kid now aren't we?

Wiping his nose on the back of his hand, slightly amused by the little feeling he had in it. Years of coke abuse had caused him to lose the feeling that had once been in the extremity. Whatever, not like he cared much anyway. But slowly his head cleared and he was actually getting a few thoughts out. Wondering whether the other inhabitants of the home had heard his loudly raised voice snap back at Norma when she commented on her being their "mother". Hoping he hadn't woken anyone, thought he more than likely had. Jeremy could get loud, especially now when it came to his mother. it was still an obviou8s sore spot, and that comment had tossed him over the edge. The straw that broke the camles back.

Then again, some members of that family could sleep through a fright train. It all depended. The fact that his step-mother had so honestly called out on his mother like that and Samuel had continued to sit reading the paper with no intervene was what he could not understand. His father was just a dore on that subject as any of them were, and yet he let her comment on it. Jeremy talked to his father about it just the other week, and it was obvious that he was still broken hearted. Enfuriating, frustrating, and confusing.

"Hey"

"Alright, as long as you aren't dragging me back home."

"You still have that thing?"

'and it's probably one of the last few sweaters that doesn't have coke on it'

He was secretive about things, tended to keep things to himself for the most part. That was how he was used to things, he was the oldest and had to be strong for his siblings, or at least come off as if he was. He was there for them, and it was not fair that he had to set off his problems on his little sister, or either of his brothers. His father was once there for him, but after their mother died, everything changed. Him and his father hardly ever got along anymore, hardly talked much at all. It would have been nice to walk there with her and just spill it out. Tell her that he was useless at this point, that he hadn't been as strong for them as he wished, that he had turned to drugs to get him by. At her comment he gave off a smile, "I don't think any of us like being there anymore." As he looked at her he was blind to the sorrow in her eyes.

Listening to her he felt that pang of guilt. Of course he was still protective, but could he really say that he was that tough? He couldn't even handle his own problems at this point, handling their's would be even harder. Which was something he hated to admit. Jeremy Scott had always been there for them, the perfect example of an older brother. He would do anything for any one of his siblings. If ever Ashley was upset, he would do anything to fix it, if ever Justy had problems he couldn't handle, Jeremy would take it to his own. He was still there, but not fully. His mind was drifting anf outted from teh world. Frequently zoning, the deeper he got into the drugs the less he noticed that his family was falling apart. His middle brother was being pulled into the world of drugs, and all Jeremy cared about was buying his own. He had not had a conversation with his youngest brother in almost two years, and he was distancing himself from the world. Ashley was somehow getting tagged a slut in her classes. Still, all he cared about was his life, partying and drugs. Soon he wouldn't have them to care for, the two middle would leave off to college, something he should have done. Justy would be there, but he was so sore from their mother's death he wouldn't speak to Jeremy, then he would be gone. And Jeremy would have nothing but his life. "Glad to hear that someone still thinks I'm tough."

If he could revert back into his shell and become that protective, careless thirteen year old, he would. His life was so much more simple then, and he had been able to have fun without worry. He and Marlon had run around, picking at Ashley and Justy. When they didn't call one another by proper names like they did now. Jeremy had gotten into the habit of speaking to his siblings as Justin, Ashley and Marlon, compared to back then when those names did not exsist, it was simply Justy, As-As, and Mar. He had tried once to quit, going cold. He stopped buying and flushed all his product. It hadn't lasted long, but he had tried. He couldn't do re-hab, because his finacing came from Norma and Samuel. They would find out and Norma would think he was even more of a useless, bum, who doesn't deserve such a good life.

Moving to the swing with her he grinned, sitting down sideays in the seat, his back leaning against the chain. Pushing himself back and forth with his toes, a calm sense in the air at this point. "So, how has my little sister been lately?" He looked at her, still trying to act like he was perfectly fine. Like he hadn't stopped in that allwayway. Even as he asked the question he mulled over in his head whether or not he shoulod talk to her. She wouldn't judge him like Norma would, or so he hoped. She was his little sister, he could only know that she would be there for him. Directly knowing that the question would be turned to him he waited, thinking of an answer as he did so.

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