Lost and alone, Poor Zeth...

[ArtemisiaChao]

Sea green eyes followed the lines of snowflakes as the fell in their twisting ways. Still snowing, but the boys hardly found that to deter them from their self-given duties of terrorizing the school. Which they hadn't been doing since the break of Christmas. This was usually a quiet time, however, bringing the boys back from their rather bleak home-life.

Of course, this Christmas had seperated them. Only one set of eyes followed those twinkling paths of snow. And one set of Libre legs now followed the corridors of the school. Gone.

Amphion Libre had yet to return to Wickerknot, though his brother had. Zethus Libre had only another two weeks to wait to again see his twin and best friend. Until then, he felt entirely lost within his own realm...that being the school.

He'd spent much of the time alone with books or staring off into space. If one were to believe in twin-telepathy, that one might think he was trying his damnedest to contact his beloved brother with mind-tricks alone. Of course, little had worked, as was a forseen event.

Back to the now. He was just standing in the middle of the courtyard, staring up into the sky, wondering how the snowflakes knew to avoid him almost entirely, parting like a curtain around him. Breath came in visible puffs, drawn out, as if to watch it longer, along with the snowflakes.

[Shiny]

Those that had bothered giving it any thought were wondering where the Irish girl had disappeared off to.

Juliet had no family in America, or friends or even acquaintances she could have bothered. She had not mentioned returning home and yet, over the holidays, she had disappeared without a trace. It was a Mystery. Unfortunately, it was one that could be very easily solved; she had gone home, via Floo, and spent day after day in the snowy, blissful haven of Galway. And unlike a certain pair of twins, she had not missed Wickerknot one tiny bit. Her homesickness had abated, and she had been happier than she had been all year.

Until, that is, four days before her return journey. Galway was a city, but Irish cities are never exactly noteworthy from an Atlas point of view. The Floo network in the south of Ireland had gone down under 'mysterious circumstances' and no one had any explanation for it. Bemused, Juliet and her family waited until the day before her set return; and the system had still not been fixed. Alarmed, the fifth year took the muggle train to Belfast with her mother, then took the Floo from there. It wasn't a good way to start off the new term, and she had returned in a foul mood, avoiding people even more than usual.

This was the reason the girl hadn't seen Zeth - and obviously not Amfy - since she had gotten back. Her homesickness came back like a head cold that just won't go away, and her general anger had driven her into solitude, trying to stay out of every potential victim's way. However, fresh air, having been avoided and shunned for so long, was in desperate demand for Juliet, and she had ventured outside at last, taking a ramble along the quiet, empty corridors and the snowy, still grounds. The first and only person she saw was one of the three people she had even given a thought to over the holidays, but for quite some time, Juliet remained distant herself, observing Zeth as he stood in the courtyard, a melancholy sight.

The Lutra student would have thought that the best person to come across at this time was Amfy; failing that, a six foot, tanned blonde girl who knew exactly how to 'comfort a man' might help a bit. But neither were available - it was just her, and she'd have to do. He might want to be on his own, but at least it was worth taking the time to find out. In hesitant, unsure steps, Juliet walked almost timidly towards the twin.

"Hey, stranger," Jools said quietly, dimly wondering what on earth she was supposed to do. "You better watch, if you stay out here too long you'll turn into a block of ice. You look like one."

Her strange, teasing sense of humour had possibly never been more inappropriate. Shuffling her feet in the snow, Juliet risked a glance at the boy, feeling immensely out of her depth. She sucked at 'emotional' malarkey. Looking at the ground so that dark waves obscured her face, Juliet once more pondered just running away. If she was Zeth, she wouldn't want her to turn up.

[ArtemisiaChao]

A gentle teasing tone caught his attention. Few of the words registered however, as most of the time he spent just starting at her. Eyes fell to the ground and he nodded, though he didn't know what he was nodding too, other than the 'block of ice' comment. "Yeah..." he murmured. "Its pretty cold..." Even after that statement, he didn't move, deciding it was ok to just stand in the cold.

It wasn't that he didn't want to see her, don't get the wrong impression, and he really did hate being alone, he just wasn't sure what to say. "But Amfy will be back..." he whispered more to himself than her. And it was the truth...for now. That 'for now', however, worried him.

A snowflake fell onto his nose, and he lowered his eyes to the ground, using his sleeve to wipe at his nose. As soon as the arm came down, he was set to hugging himself, while he whimpered softly, "I'm so lonely, Jools. Its awful. I can't stand this!" But he didn't cry, something he was damn proud of himself for, though his face was strained with the effort not to let the tears fall.

((x.x;; sorry, short postie))

[Speckled]

In the moment that Jools and one of the twins shared, Mary Beth could hear some sort of dramatic music in her head that would occupy this space if the moment had been in a stage play or television show. Some sort of slow, sentimental music that tugged at your heart, and at the same time, gave you hope. Mary Beth looked up, as if the orchestra was sitting above her and she could see it.

Maybe she could. She didn't know anymore. She had given up eating over the holiday because, well, she didn't really feel like it. She didn't even remember that eating was something people had to do to live anymore. Oh, sure, she ate when she HAD, but she didn't feel like going to it.

She had stumbled through the hallways, faint, and she had been...seeing things. Unexplained things in the corner of her eyes. Someone with a horse's body as legs running by? A fox with horns watching her form that tree? Was that the hairy, hulking body, the bright yellow eyes, the elongated snout of-?

She couldn't help it anymore. It wouldn’t go away. But she couldn't link eating with the hallucinations anymore. She didn't even know what eating was. She didn't think any more. But this had been going on for five days. It always happened before the full moon. But she couldn't blame that. It was her fault. This happened every month. And after every month, she decreased in human speech and increased in insanity. Who noticed the change? No one. No one at all. Not the people she knew, not the people she didn't, she bet, not even the teachers.

And as she sat there, having exhausted all her normality and optimism for that day, with her back facing toward Zeth and Jools, her head slightly tilted so she could hear. But, she didn't understand what they were saying. Sadly, Mary Beth turned her head again, and slumped down further against the tree. Maybe later she would hear them. She just didn't feel like herself right now.

The truth was, she hadn't felt like herself for a long time.

|Ooc: Yeah...I feel like putting her were-wolfness into full effect right now, because I fear it will be forgotten if I don't...|

[Shiny]

(Poor Zeth. Screw that, poor Jools. She's not good with sad people, dammit!)

Shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot, Juliet hugged the cloak tightly around her, as if it would shield her from the dire seriousness of the situation. She had a random impulse to start Irish dancing in a very funny joke, which made her stifle an insane giggle. Obviously both were... Inappropriate. This was her reaction to depressed people.

She was just no good with them.

"But Amfy will be back..."

The fifth year caught herself nodding in agreement, glancing up to look at Zeth and realizing he wasn't really talking to her. Looking back down, she pondered the amount of people who could possibly cheer Zeth up at this point in time. M.B. would have been better at it than her - although that wasn't saying much, really. She looked around briefly, although she didn't see M.B.'s back. If she had, she would have run to the first year for help. As it was, she just looked at Zeth again.

"I'm so lonely, Jools. Its awful. I can't stand this!"

Oh hell, Juliet thought, stricken. She recognized the tone of voice - the slightly closed over throat, the battle against tears. After another mute plea for help, Juliet shuffled over to the twin, searching desperately for some kind of logical response. That was why she was no good with sadness - logic had no solution for it. Pausing, the fifth year patted Zeth awkwardly on the arm.

"I'm - I'm really sorry, Zeth. And I know how you feel. Honest."

Part of her expected a backlash, which would be understandable. How could Juliet have any idea of what Zeth was going through? Perhaps if he asked, she would tell him. It was melodramatic and she wasn't keen on sharing any of her past with anyone, really, but - well, if he asked, she would tell him. He deserved to know that he would still be all right, no matter what happened. Other twins had come through worse.

[ArtemisiaChao]

Zeth didn't notice MB appearing, though he was far more caught up in his own self to realize most anything. He'd barely noticed Juliet standing there, only working up half-assed replies to what she said. Until he nearly lost it, that is.

The awkward pat on his arm turned his attention to her. Glossy eyes stared unblinkingly at her. A slight tilt of the head. "You do?" he mumbled softly. Most of the time Zeth had heard such a phrase, the owner had been just trying to cheer him up. What reason did he have to trust such words?

But it was Juliet, and Zeth had a known soft spot for her. Face was turned upwards again, to stare at the falling snow. Just another distraction. Now that Zeth thought of it, his cheeks and nose were rather cold, to the point it hurt. Maybe he should go inside? No. Even though his ears had begun to ache as well.

((just got off work...so braindead...x.x; ))

[Shiny]

"You do?"

The fact that Zeth and Amfy were so unpredictable had always been part of the friendship for Juliet; she was willing to go along with suggestions, and was ceaselessly amused by what the twins tended to suggest. But just then, Juliet felt miserable towards this usually lovable quality; she had no idea what she should say, and even less when Zeth didn't react the way people were supposed to. It might have been narrow-minded, but it would have made Juliet feel better if there was an encyclopedia on "How People Will React To What You Say During Serious Situations". Whoever wrote such a collection of knowledge would make a lot of money.

"I... Er, yeah."

It dawned on Juliet, albeit slowly, that she was possibly supposed to continue. It wasn't that she had never told anyone; her friends back home knew, and most of the adults in the tightly knit community did too. But it seemed different over here. It seemed... Like a big deal, like a big secret. Like if she told someone, she would really be accepting the fact that she, Juliet Harman, lived in California now. It would obliterate that nice shield of denial she had been building up so gradually.

"I had a twin," Juliet said, the words tumbling out as if to stop her internal rant. She paused, blinked, looked at the ground to Zeth to the ground again, and shrugged blankly. "She died."

No matter how she tried to put it, the words just wouldn't come out understated.

[ArtemisiaChao]

"I had a twin." Zeth stared. Juliet was a twin? "She died."

Well...first off, Zeth felt the undesirable urge to apply this to his own situation, and quickly lost all sense of reality. Life without his twin? Unbearable. Even now it was horrendous to be seperated from the bestest best friend and brother and absolutely the most trusted person he knew. To lose him forever would be more than a tragedy, it would be...

Frankly, he didn't know what it would be and he didn't feel like dwelling on such a lonesome topic. However.

The sea-green eyes hadn't wavered off her form for the better part of the silence, only once darting away in shock at her statements. Zeth really wasn't quite sure what to say, to do. Here he was mourning the loss of a few days and she had the eternity to think it over.

A copy of that book would come in handy right about now.

Zeth did the only thing he could possibly think of: he hugged her. Gently wrapping his arms around her as if she were a china doll, liable to break were he to squeeze too hard. Cut short, he pulled away the moment his hands touched one another, feeling awkward for pulling such a stunt and moving away to as if embarrassed, though no coloring to indicate he was shown on his face.


((ARTY'S A LAZY BUM!!!!! x.x;; >>; and she has to write a play...and a lab report...bleh....*runs off to procrastinate some more*))

[Shiny]

There was a silence.

It wasn't that she didn't like silences; it was Juliet, of course she didn't mind them. But uneasy silences made the girl... Well... Uneasy. The 'I've just been run over by a train driven by a half-man half-mongoose' expression on Zeth's face wasn't helpful; she wouldn't have assumed he were drowning in pity for her, more like as a twin, he would find it much more... Major... Than the usual confidents did. But she wasn't as badly off as Zeth; she hadn't spent her whole life living with her twin only to be tortured with the thought of separation, the way Juliet was sure both twins were now.

All in all, however, she quite felt she preferred the silence to the hug.

One moment, the twin was looking at her sorrowfully, which was uncomfortable enough; the next there was a sudden flurry of movement and Juliet was wondering why her personal space alarm was beeping madly. For a blankly surprised moment, she was blissfully free from thought or judgement; then the brief embrace passed and Juliet had an expression somewhat similiar to Zeth's previous. After a moment, she raised an eyebrow somewhat nonplussed.

"That... Er... Thank you." It seemed, really, it was the only thing she could say. "Look, I'm just saying is all, you're not alone, neither of you."

To end off this spectacular display of tact and subtlety, the fifth year fidgeted a little, looking just a little bit uncomfortable.

[Speckled]

At the "I have a twin once," Mary Beth had whirled around, surprised to hear Juliet's voice saying that. Juliet...what? She felt as if she had been slapped, and her mind un-fogged for a few seconds. In her time of clarity, it was still hard to accept the fact, and to think of two Juliets. Maybe if she crossed her eyes she could see it, but the concept was still quite distant to her. M.B.’s head stayed peaking around the tree, her eyes unblinking and fixated on the two talking. She knew it was rude to eavesdrop, but she wouldn't learn things otherwise. How would she have learned this? Juliet wouldn't have said it as a conversation started, that was for sure.

Still amazed at the fact that Juliet had had someone who looked like her, and with questions she wished she could ask her ("Were they a boy or girl?" "What was their name?" "When did they die?" etc.) she kept her mouth firmly shut, mists of breath coming in light white bursts form her nose with her eyes widened in surprise. She looked like a deer in the spotlight of a car.

Still more surprise came when she saw the two hugged. You could call it a friendly hug, or a comforting hug, but she knew it was knowledge, information, history, that might include some nervous glances in the future between the two twinless Lutra's, that she would've never understood if she had not been here.

And so it was all good.

Unless they saw her...

[ArtemisiaChao]

"Not...alone..." Zeth murmured softly, as if hearing it for the first time. He'd heard it plenty from the teachers trying to comfort the slightly broken Zeth. Of course, overused words always sounded better from someone you erm...admired. And most everyone who knew Zeth, which was most everyone in Wickerknot, knew he erm...admired Juliet.

He nodded meekly, wondering if he should've hugged her like he did. 'It was a stupid move,' he scolded himself lightly, though his mind still was on his own brother and the distance between them.

The distance between them...Zeth's eyes went distant as he thought about it. Slowly, he took on the look of someone who'd recently taken a punch to the stomach and had just barely recovered in time for the next hit. He couldn't stop himself, no matter how hard he tried as he staggered back. Coughing sobs brought the tears, which he frantically tried to erase with his sleeves, turning away from Juliet. The last thing he wanted was for her to see him cry.

It only took a moment for the tears to run out, which Zeth was thankful for, though he didn't turn back to face the girl. Mouth formed words, but vocals cords refused to voice them without more tears, and so he was quiet, taking deep breaths to calm himself down. Eyes had fallen to his own feet, staring as if they were the most interesting things in the world, if only to hold his attention away from his obvious pain.

[Shiny]

Completely unaware of their friendly spectator, Juliet felt very small all of a sudden, wondering what had possessed her to imagine she could compare her experience with Zeth and Amfy's situation, or how she could comfort someone so deep in fear and depression. News of Zeth's erm... admiration for Jools was apparently known to everyone but herself, which in some way, was not at all surprising.

"Not...alone..."

Zeth's voice was so devoid of hope that Juliet felt a wave of bleak depression herself, which quite distorted her apathy, leaving raw nerve ends in its wake. Alarmed, she tried to think of something to distract herself from becoming swallowed up by the simple emotion of caring for someone; her 'something' turned out to be singing a certain song in her head. Namely, MC Hammer's You Can't Touch This. She had just gotten to "stop... It's hamma time" when Zeth... Broke.

Being so absorbed in the distraction she had sought, Jools had completely missed the change of expression on her friend's face; all she knew was one minute, MC Hammer was 'breakin it down' and the next, Zeth was... Crying.

His back was to her, but that didn't hide the audio. Actual... Sobs. Both horrified and upset at the same unpleasant time, Juliet tried yet again to think of something comforting to say. And yet again, nothing came to mind. Stuck for anything else to do, she stared at the still form in front of her, and then shuffled forward a bit.

"It's okay," the Irish girl said, quietly. "You had to cry some time. Anyone would if they were in your position."

Even as she said it, she felt stupid. What sort of comfort was that? And why was everyone else in the world much better at being reassuring than she was?

"I mean... I mean Amfy has it worst. You know that. He's... He's stuck there, in that stupid school that I can never remember the name of, and he doesn't know anyone, and all he can do is think about- about how you're so far away--" The words stopped abruptly as Juliet's voice broke, most embarassingly. She paused for a few seconds, trying to get it back under control; she hadn't meant to say that... It had just been said, with no apparent consideration. For a moment, her lip wobbled, but she got that under control too. Still, it was all she could do to keep from bawling herself; and she was surprised to find her arm had snuck to Zeth's shoulder, as if trying to give him a one-armed backwards hug.

"I'm sorry, I- I wish I could help you, but I've been trying so hard and I can't think of anything. I'm so stupid! There must be something and I'm missing it--" again, her voice cracked, but this time Juliet couldn't stop the outbreak of tears. She hardly ever cried, even with the best of reasons. Horrified at her display, she withdrew her hand, trying to stop crying.

It didn't work.

((Haha. Putting Jools through hell = fun!))

[Speckled]

Crying. They were both crying. Mary Beth felt her stomach clench, and she tried to keep pressure off her tear glands. The emotion, the depression in the air pulled down on her, and she felt herself joining in with the tear crying. But her tears had nothing to do with what was going on for the jolting tears of the others just spread to her own eyes. They were not hers.

She bit her lip, and turned away, wiping her cheek on her upper arm. Now was not the time to be noticed. She had to stay quite, but she just couldn’t help this. But what could she do now? She'd only make it worse and make them feel angry that she had heard them. She was an official eavesdropper.

Mary Beth presses her fingers against her forehead. What could she do what could she do? The blunt facts were, though, that this was not her place and this was not the time. Juliet seemed to be handling herself. Err, sort of. She seemed to be breaking down, losing her footing a bit in her choice of words. She needed backup. But she couldn’t give that backup. She would ruin the moment. Yet, she had to do something. Mary Beth felt herself easing up, and shuffling off. She could just enter from another angle, and pretend that she had just popped up. Yeah, then they would be none the wiser. She had to sneak off, stay low, and be quite.

But what would happen then? Would they be angry that she had interrupted their conversation, or stop immediately to leave her out? Fretting greatly, and her eyes not on the surrounding landscape, Mary Beth walked quickly to nearby bushes, stumbling and breaking braches and rustling leaves loudly. She yelped, and clambered up, knowing that there was no hope that they had not heard that. The only thing she could do now was stay low and hope they didn't glance over. Shoot, so much for staying low and being quite.

|Ooc: Shiny calls her posts short…what do you call this?|

[ArtemisiaChao]

Zeth threw a quick glance over his shoulder as she started to talk about Amfy. He nodded slightly. Although, Amfy would enjoy starting over without anyone knowing him, Zeth was sure of this. He could even imagine his brother laughing upon hearing Zeth had actually cried over him. 'Complete nonsense...' Amfy would say, 'You let complete nonsense get to you! You let father get to you! C'mon now, Evening Star!'

"You had to cry some time. Anyone would if they were in your position."

He laughed softly, his voice still thick with tears and longing. "Not Amfy. Amfy wouldn't cry. He would fuss and snarl and blame everything on Father...but he wouldn't cry." All of that said barely above a whisper, as if he still was very mistrusting of his voice. Silent a moment, he tried to figure out how to handle this.

What had he done? Eyes widened considerably. The crack in her voice...he turned abruptly, suddenly uncaring whether she knew about his tears, which he was sure she did anyhow. "Juliet, Juliet..." he whispered, in horror, hands moving to grip her shoulders firmly. "Please, please don't cry...please be happy. Don't--" He was cut off midsentence.

The rustling and breaking and yelp...Eyes narrowed at the bushes the sound came from. The hands dropped from Juliet's shoulders and he ventured a step towards the sound. Jumping around, his eyes caught sight of MB. Another shocked expression took over his face, breath pushed from his lungs as if he'd had none at all. How much had she seen? Heard? He spun to face Juliet. 'Oh Merlin...I don't think she wanted her to hear that about her twin and...' Not quite sure what to do, he stood frozen, glancing back and forth between MB and Juliet. What had he started?

((A quote comes to mind, from "What Dreams May Come" with Robin Williams and Cuba Gooding Junior: "Betcha thinkin' 'oh shit!' now!" lmao))

[Shiny]

Zeth's words were quite lost on Juliet, who was much more pre-occupied with the tears that streaked down her face, determined to humiliate her in front of someone she erm... Admired. At some point it registered that he was saying her name, and she felt a pressure on her shoulders; she couldn't look up, far too busy was she with wiping her face desperately, and turning a fetching shade of crimson. Hiding mostly behind her hands, she didn't reply when Zeth said "Please, please don't cry...please be happy. Don't--", but did eventually look up at the sudden burst of noise.

As the twin took a step forward, Juliet took a moment to wipe her face again on the sleeve of her robe, before peering, puffy-eyed, over his shoulder.

"MB!"

The call was involuntary, and for a moment Juliet could only stand in frozen horror at the thought of her past and her embarassing breakdown. It was something she hadn't wanted anyone to see, not Zeth or MB or- or anyone. For a moment, she was quite silent, before her gaze shifted rapidly around the courtyard. In a whirl of movement, Jools took off, escaping the situation quite literally, her destination her dormitory. She thought briefly, as her steps carried her further and further away from her two friends, that such a cowardly retreat was well-justified; after all, when the going gets tough, the tough get going. Fast and in the opposite direction.