Okay. Somebody help me out here. I don't get it.

I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be sorry I asked, but does anyone know what Chuck is talking about????

Do we, ever, know what, Chucks talkin' bout??? We must forgive him. His age is begining to tell on him. :D

That's what we are here for...

Our sole purpose in 'Life on the Back Forty' is to help out Mrs. Melinda Jonelle Gerner. We all wake up each day with excitement and anticipation of that purpose in our lives.

When you speaketh thru the keyboard. We are all attentive to every word you speaketh. And just like Phillip there in Murfreesboro. We in our own, individual states throughout this great United States, as only Men can, hear every word you speaketh.

So when you say 'You don't get it'. You're not gone to be sorry you asked. Because, we are all here to help and we all have our own areas of specialization. And this one is Mr. Leep's. He should be along shortly to help you out.

Until then. If you would like anymore of our sincere and attentive help.

Don't be shy. Just speaketh up.

Your age will be telling on you in 29 days

Chuck ... (I'm slowly shaking my head in amazement here) You've set some kind of record for yourself with that speech. It's the biggest bunch of baloney you've put out in the past five BALONEY-FILLED-AND-RUNNING-OVER-THE-TOP years!

Chuck, Jonelle and I would really, really like to help you out..Which way did you come in..??.. :D :D .. :ROFL: :ROFL: .. :dunno: :dunno:


Leep:

Phillip's trying to watch over my shoulder from his hospital bed ... He can easily recognize the back forty background, but he can't read my words from such a distance, so he's asking, "Jonelle, are you aggravating Chuck again?"

I say, "No no no no, Phillip. I'm only asking how church was this morning."

He comes back with his, "uh huh." Spoken as only a damnyankee can speak it ... heavy on the sarcasm. Indicating that he doesn't believe a word coming out of his dear wife's mouth.

Why does life have to be so cotton pickin hard?

Why are men so difficult?

Why?

That is a very good question asked by all women both North and South of the Mason/Dixon line.

And because all men, all around the world, and especially here on the 'Back Forty' strive each and every day to regain the simpleness of life to which man was intended. Let me answer your well thought out and processed question. Not only for you. But also for 4 of the 'Best Five are Mine' (because the 5th knows) and for all women both North and South of that famous line.

The answer goes back to the beginning of time. And like all answers, it is found in the 'Bible'. Specifically in the book of Genesis.

I don't remember the exact verse. So I'll paraphrase...

Man was made perfect and designed for a simple life by God...and then WOMAN intervened with that darn apple and Man's life, forever, became difficult.

Not Funny.

The machines have taken over. LOL

Ya it is...

Rob doesn't hear anything from this direction. Phillip is NOT laughing.

Phillip is sound asleep. He's supposed to be working a puzzle in the daily paper ... a cyrptaquote. Do ya'll do them? He's three days behind right this minute.

Anyway, He got stuck on one so he roped me in to help him. I printed out one copy. Figured one copy was all I'd need to break that code and solve the puzzle. Phillip was studying his newspaper copy. I was studying my copy of the copy and marking what I just knew was gonna be the right letters. But it wasn't.

so, I took Phillip's newspaper back to the printer and made TWO copies that time, returned the newspaper to Phillip and settled down to get that thing solved once and for all. Soon marked those two copies up so bad nothing made sense. Needed to borrow Phillip's newspaper one more time to go back to the printer, and guess what? I discovered Phillip was holding his puzzle copy right in front of two closed eyes. Sound asleep. How do you like that. I'd been talking ... comparing notes ... with a sleeping man. Doing his work for him while he was sleeping on the job.

I'm heading for the kitchen. I suddenly have a hankering for pancakes. Haven't mentioned it to Phillip yet, but you can be sure he'll eat twice as many as I do.

Ah well miss Jonelle, that is as it should be.. :blushing

Pancakes sound just fin even this late at night.. :ThumbsUp:

Leep:

I've never tried them, Jonelle, I know it's important to exercise the brain. I don't think I really believed that until I had a caregiver about a year ago that was a biologist. He knew the Latin names for every wildflower around here and taught them to me. I had a pretty tough time remembering when we started. I could barely learn one in a day or two. Within a few weeks, we were up to five or six new ones each day. Great mental exercise. I've got a caregiver now a couple days a week and she is going to school. Together we are learning her microbiology now and soon we will start anatomy. Should be a challenge. She's coming over a few evenings a week just to study so I'm going to have my hands full!
Don

Don! Good for you! Latin names for wildflowers sound pretty impossible.

Yes, mental exercise is very important. My daughter, Karen, has promised if Phillip and I keep doing crossword puzzles daily faithfully we will never have alzheimers. (probably spelled that wrong) If we do get it, we plan to sue that girl for all she's worth!

Phillip hasn't been able to go into the doctor's office for four years now. We share the same doctor, so once a year when I go for my check up he always wants to know if Phillip is still working his puzzles. I tell him, "yes. Better than ever." That seems to mean something to the good doctor.

Something new has developed just recently, though. Phillip needed home health nurses to come draw blood for lab work about a month ago and our doctor turned us down. He said Phillip would have to come into his office. Or rather his nurse said he said Phillip would have to come in to his office. Probably something to do with liability. We've done nothing, so far. Phillip can't go anywhere except by ambulance. What to do? what to do? ....

We're thinking about trying to find a doctor who makes housecalls. there is one in the Murfreesboro area, but he seems to be exclusively owned by a home health agency. We don't need their services. We just need someone who can supervise lab work and write Phillip's prescriptions for Lasix. No pain pills are ever involved so it looks like somebody would be willing to help us out here.

Why does life have to be so hard????

I never go to the doctor for lab work. A nurse comes to the house and draws blood.

Does she use a crayon or a magic marker..??.. :D .. :dunno: :dunno: .. :ROFL:

Leep:

My local hospital as well as a couple different nursing agencies in the county have been out here a couple times over the years. I wouldn't think you'd need a doctor to draw blood either...

I do go to the hospital every 28 days now for my Tysabri infusion. They do blood tests when they access my port. I will never get another IV while conscious!

Don

No, Don, it isn't that we need the doctor to actually draw blood, but we need a doctor to authorize home health nurses to do it, and if a doctor has to examine Phillip before this authorizing can be done and Phillip can't get in to the doctor's office, then maybe we need a doctor to come to our home. We're looking into it.

Our primary care doctor has been prescribing Phillip's Lasix and Zanaflex for the past four years or so without actually seeing him in person. But that practice has now come to an end. We understand. Or at least we're trying to. It probably has something to do with the doctor protecting himself against a malpractice suit. Or it may have to do with Medicare and Phillip's supplemental insurance not paying enough to make it worthwhile to the doctor.

We'd like somebody to spell out our options for us, but when we've requested this in the past, a nursing home is first thing out of their mouths. And we're years away from that kind of solution.

I was shocked a couple of years ago when we bought a new Hoyer lift and tried to donate our old one to charity, only to be told there was no call for Hoyer lifts because when a patient's condition was bad enough to require a Hoyer lift at home, he was put in a nursing home. What??? We advertised a free Hoyer lift on Craig's list and a woman came for it right away. So much for that.

People just don't understand how satisfied Phillip and I are right here in our little apartment. They have no idea how easy our daily life is. We have everything we need to function well. We're set up exactly the way we want to be and need to be. Our routine has evolved over the years. We've thrown out everything that isn't essential to our survival and our own brand of happiness.

Instead of a sofa and coffee table, we have Phillip's hospital bed arranged right in the center of the living room, surrounded by shelves of supplies and rolling tables and carts. Plus his wheelchair sits close by his bed. He no longer sits in it, but the great heavy thing has turned out to be worth it's weight in gold when he pulls on it as he's turning on his side. We couldn't manage without that wheel chair. I've made magic marker marks on the tile floor showing exactly where the wheels must go. Its position must not vary even an inch or two one direction or the other. As he rolls over his one good hand must come down to rest right on the handle of that chair. And I've twisted a bunch of rubber bands around that smooth handle to give him a better grasp to pull on as he finishes pulling himself over on his side.

Our whole world seems to be held together with rubber bands and masking tape and safety pins and bungee cords, Don, and neither of us gives a hoot. The weirder our stop-gap measures turn out to be and the goofier they look, the louder we laugh. We're simply no longer concerned about appearances.

Besides ... We're not planning to invite the queen for tea anytime soon.

Phillip and I are okay. Life is good. We're not suffering. Neither of us is on pain pills. We're connected to the world by TV, phone and computer. Our good hours outnumber our bad ones by far. We love each other very much.

Life is good.

Jonelle, don't worry about Chuck. Notice at the beginning of this thread he uses the word (speaketh) a lot. From yhis we have figured out that he actually does not think of himself as an angel, but rather a knight in shining armor from mideval times.
Yes a time when men were men and women were almost men! Humor the poor chap. We all will be old as him soon enough! :ROFL:

Jonelle, don't worry about Chuck. Notice at the beginning of this thread he uses the word (speaketh) a lot. From yhis we have figured out that he actually does not think of himself as an angel, but rather a knight in shining armor from mideval times.
Yes a time when men were men and women were almost men! Humor the poor chap. We all will be old as him soon enough! :ROFL:

Mark

Oh no, the Judge now speaks in stereo.. :D

And, since Phillip and Jonelle have already thrown out everything that is non essential, Chuck better not visit anytime soon.. :D ... :ROFL: :ROFL:

I wish and pray that your situation not only is all you need but that it continues to improve...

And, if you and Phillip need any little thing that you might just want and not really need....Something that you might want just for the fun or convenience of it, let me know..Send me a private message..

(Uh just don't ask for someone to knock off Chuck, all my contacts are either retired or dead... :D :D ...I could send this one retired nurse up to tickle him to death.. :D :D ... :ROFL: :ROFL: )

Phillip, keep working that arm man, until you look like Popeye.. :ThumbsUp: :ThumbsUp:


Take care you two..

Leep

You're a good man, Leep. We love you!

I don't get it

Jonelle always speaketh those words to Leep

I have never had those words keyboard speakethed to me. I don't even get smiley icons


**************************************************************
And Mark...

I think you're there !

We know that you already know that we know you're a good man and we love you, therefore, there's no need to say it in words. Leep might not know, and it's important to us for him to know, so we type the words right out there for all the world to see. See?

Only one of us in this family uses icons, and it ain't me.

OK! I get it now.

Leep is not doing cross word puzzles. So his memory is fading. And you have to keep typing those words over and over again to make him think that he actually is remembering.

I have noticed that too. Because Mr. Leep keeps using the same descriptive worded phrases over and over again when speakething to me.

Uncle

How about "oh brother!"

Yeah Chuck, its creeping up..... Some old timers repeat themselves...... We computer guys just keep repeating our messages........... repeating our messages...... repeat.................................Oh.

Mark