Mare Serenitatis

[Sailor Mercury]

She had to run. She had to hide. She had to find somewhere that no one would ever find her. She paused for a frantic moment unsure of where she should go and then ran down the stairs to the lowest levels of the palace. She could feel her eyes stinging with unshed tears and she mentally scolded herself. She couldn't let anyone see her cry. She wasn't free to cry even down here where she would be completely hidden. She could only cry back on Mercury when she saw the regent. Mercury. She'd have to go back to see her father's funeral. She was the Queen. She'd have to appear composed and oversee all of the events. She'd have to see her father's slowly decaying body. She couldn't do it. She couldn't. She'd have to hide until everything was over. She walked into one of the rooms knowing exactly where she was going. There was a trap door in one of these rooms. She was sure that she was the only one who knew about it. It led her to a narrow passage under the floor which she had to crawl through. At the end of the passage there was a dark room. It was furnished and looked like it had once been a bedroom. Perhaps a room for the royal family to hide in if there was ever any type of crisis. Riri was sure that no one would mind her hiding in it. She stood in the room, closing a vent that she had taken to the room. It was cold and she could hear rats and dripping water and smell mold. She didn't care. All she wanted to do was curl up and die.

She looked around the barely lit room unsure of where she should hide. In the dresser? Under the bed? Certainly not in the middle of the room. It didn't feel safe. What if they managed to find her? It felt so wide open. She finally decided on the wardrobe. She opened it and several moths flew out, spreading dust with them and going to rest on the still intact bedspread. She crawled in the wardrobe and closed the door behind her, resting among the moth eaten fur coats. She shivered a little and decided to pull one down and put it on. "Papa..." Her voice was barely even a whisper. She couldn't even hear footsteps of people above her. Maybe she was was safe here. Maybe she could cry and no one would find her. She curled up in a ball at the bottom of the wardrobe and let out a small moan as tears escaped her eyes. No... This couldn't be happening.

In awhile she was asleep, tears caked on her dusty face. Her dress was much the same and it was certainly ruined. She let out a hushed cry in her sleep. She was sure she could see her parents. Her father was transparent and whispering to her mother, who looked like she wanted to follow him. She kept reaching out her hand to him and it kept falling to the floor without ever making contact. A knife rattled to the floor. Her mother picked it up with a strange, crazy, laugh. Then she did something that made Riri open her mouth to scream. She plunged the knife into her own chest. The young girl tried to scream, but she couldn't produce a sound. Then the wardrobe was opened in one violent motion. "Riri!" The Mercury regent shouted pulling her out by her dress and tossing her on the floor like a useless rag doll. "You little devil! It's all your fault! You let them die! You have powers! Why didn't you save them?! You little witch!" He slapped her and she cried out. "They should be alive. You should be the one dead..."

She could hear her parents laughing as their blissful ghosts danced around the room. "Mama... Papa..." She whispered. "Have you forgotten all about me?"

"Of course they've forgotten all about you." She could see Serenity standing above her. "Why would anyone want to remember a stupid miserable child like you? I never liked you, you know that? You always were such a bother. You can't make yourself useful to do anything, can you?"

"That's right you little bitch!" Acacia kicked her. "You're weak! If anyone ever came to harm Serenity you'd be of no help! You'd just get in the way! You would let her die!" Riri's eyes widened as Serenity, Acacia, the Mercury regent, and Asami all circled around her. She couldn't even hear their words anymore. She just knew they were shouting and that they hated her. Then the ghosts of her mother and father passed through the circle to stand right by her, holding knives. Their faces were warped and scared her. "That's right darling... Come join us in the hell that you let us descend into!"

[Chara Aino]

Curiosity killed the cat. It was a saying that practically ruled Chara’s life. She liked to explore and she was naturally curious. Although it hadn’t gotten her major trouble in her life yet, it had gotten her into some pretty close encounters with what could have turned into major trouble. For example, there had been that time on Neptune where she had wanted to know what was in the abandoned tower. She had noted that the wooden steps looked like they were rotting, but she had assumed that she was light enough that it wouldn’t be a problem. Wrong. Nearly to the top, she had put her bag, which was filled with a good amount of pretty rocks from the ocean just beyond the castle, down on the next step and the wood had snapped in two, letting the bag drop down to the level below her and then roll down the next level of the spiral stairs. That had been enough to get her right out of the tower without another thought.

Today her sense of curiosity had been especially strong. She had spent the entire day running around the castle, poking her head into rooms and generally just wandering around. Chara had run into her sister, Serenity, and the other Senshi a few times during her rounds, but she had just greeted them and gone on with her exploration. Really, there wasn’t much point in ‘exploring’ the palace. After spending nearly two years in it total, she knew just about everything there was to know. But still, it was a sport and even if she knew what she was going to find, it was still fun to look. You never knew when something new was going to show up.

But because of her high level of curiosity that day, she had immediately begun to trail Riri when she saw her hurry past her in the hallway. Although she looked like she was doing her best to hold back the despair that was threatening to engulf her, Chara could feel it radiating off of her, even if her sense of emotions was weak. Obviously something terrible had happened to the poor Senshi. But she only got down one hallway before a hand on her shoulder stopped her.

Chara started a bit and turned to see who it was. She let out a sigh when she saw it was only Asami. “You scared me,” she said, offering her sister a slight smile.

Asami, being her usual blunt self, didn’t bother to respond with any sort of small talk response. She just got right down to what she wanted to say. “Don’t follow her.”

“What?”

“I said,” Asami replied, her voice emotionless as always, “Don’t follow her. Even Serenity’s giving her a little space now.”

“What happened?” Chara asked quietly. Obviously it was something serious if everyone, even Serenity, was leaving Riri alone. It wasn’t like the Senshi and their princess to leave one of their own alone while they suffered. At least not unless she specifically requested it… Her curiosity began to grow.

“Nothing you need to know about.” Chara pouted and Asami frowned at her. “It’s none of your business.” Chara sighed and nodded. Asami gave her the slightest smile and ruffled her hair before walking off the opposite way Riri had gone, leaving Chara standing in the hallway.

She watched her sister leave for a few seconds and then turned to stare the way Riri had gone. Without thinking much about what she was doing, she hurried off in that direction. Knowing that Riri sometimes went down to the lower levels of the palace, she tried that first. Making her emotion sense go as strong as possible, she searched for the despair she had felt before. After a few minutes she found it although it was barely readable, coming from behind at least the door to the room she was in, perhaps another one.

Pushing the door open gently, she peeked in, but saw no one. That was odd. “Riri?” she called quietly. “Riri, are you in here?” She searched for the despair again and followed it. It led her too… the wardrobe? Kneeling down in front of it. She pulled one of the doors open and smiled slightly, seeing the older girl. “Asami told me to leave you alone, but I’m curious.” Chara said trying to sound cheerful and understanding at the same time.

[Sailor Mercury]

Riri blinked several times as Chara put her hand on her shoulder and startled her from sleep. "Chara... Riri... Papa..." Her eyes began to well up with tears that she couldn't hold back as she hugged the younger girl. "Papa's dead! He's dead and it's all Riri's fault! Riri has these powers! Riri should have been able to save him! Riri should have read medical books and found a way to cure him!" Her voice lowered to a whisper. "But... Riri was too scared... So Riri didn't help him... It's all Riri's fault..." She wiped her tears away. She had been told that Chara understood people's feelings no matter what. Maybe that's why she was telling her everything. Or maybe she just couldn't hold back her pain anymore.

"Riri has to go to Mercury. For Papa's funeral. But Riri's scared. Riri doesn't want to see the body... That makes everything real." Her lip trembled slightly. "Riri just had a nightmare. Mama was so sad now that Papa was gone that she killed herself. And then... The Mercury regent and Serenity and Acacia and Asami came. And they... They said they hated Riri. That Riri was just a big bother." She drew back into the wardrobe slight, hugging her knees. "Riri knows it's true. Riri shouldn't worry the Princess and the senshi with all of her problems. And Riri shouldn't let him see her cry... He already has enough to worry about. That's all Riri's fault too... Riri assigned him as regent because Riri couldn't do anything herself. Now he has to deal with all of Riri's problems. But... Riri can't do everything on her own. Riri has to tell someone."

She buried her head in her knees, once again holding back tears. "Riri..." Her voice was muffled. "Riri always makes everyone worry. Riri's so stupid! Riri isn't worth a moment of Serenity's worry! Serenity is busy busy! She shouldn't have to deal with a bothersome girl like Riri..."

[Chara Aino]

"Chara... Riri... Papa... Papa's dead! He's dead and it's all Riri's fault! Riri has these powers! Riri should have been able to save him! Riri should have read medical books and found a way to cure him! But... Riri was too scared... So Riri didn't help him... It's all Riri's fault..."

Chara’s eyes widened in surprise as Riri hugged her. She hadn’t been expecting such an immediate response, seeing as the girl had just been sleeping a second before. But then Chara settled a little and returned the hug. “Aw, it’s not your fault, Riri,” she said, trying to sound as reassuring as possible. “You’re not a doctor, so no one was expecting you to cure your father,” That didn’t sound like quite enough to Chara though, so she searched for something else to say. What would Asami say? Serenity? After a second she came up with something. “Your job to help your father was to live a strong life for him and that’s just what you did. You were great.” Who knew such smart sounding wisdom could come out of her mouth?

But Riri had answered her curiosity. So her father had died after being sick for so long… Chara felt terrible and she hugged Riri a little tighter. She couldn’t even begin to imagine what it would be like to give up someone she loved. She wasn’t that attached to her parents, but she knew she’d mourn for days if she was to lose either one of them. Riri had no doubted been much closer to her father than Chara was to hers. Even while feeling it curl around her, she couldn’t even begin to imagine the pain Riri was in at the moment. It was just too great.

"Riri has to go to Mercury. For Papa's funeral. But Riri's scared. Riri doesn't want to see the body... That makes everything real."

“I’ll come with you,” Chara volunteered quickly. “I was just about ready to leave the Moon for a bit and visit another planet anyways. And Serenity and Asami and everyone else will come too. We’ll all be there for you.” Truth be told, the idea of seeing a dead body frightened Chara as well. She had never seen one after all. And dead bodies were, well, dead. And that was creepy and sad and depressing, especially if you knew who it was and had spent time with them while they were alive. Chara hadn’t spent too much time with Riri’s father, but they had been acquainted.

"Riri just had a nightmare... She shouldn't have to deal with a bothersome girl like Riri..."

“Don’t say that!” Chara exclaimed, alarmed by Riri’s self loathing. “None of that’s true! Your mama’s not going to kill herself! And the Mercury Regent’s you’re best friend, right? And Serenity and Acacia and Asami would never hate you either. They’re your best friends too! They want to hug you right now and tell you it’s all alright.” She grinned slightly. “Well, maybe not Asami. She doesn’t hug people. But she’d tell you the everything’s going to be alright. And Serenity’s not that busy. She had time to run away from my sister today, didn’t she?”

[Sailor Mercury]

Riri looked at Chara through speculative eyes as if she didn't really believe the girl. And in truth, she didn't. But she wasn't about to say that. There was no point in arguing with her. Chara would never admit that it was her fault. No, her words were hallow words of comfort that didn't really mean anything. Just like all the things that were said about her father someday getting better. False promises. Nothing more. I'm such a terrible person that even a twelve year old feels she has to worry herself about me, Riri thought sadly. She had made someone else sad because of her. How must Serenity, who was an extremely sweet person and a good friend, be feeling? The thought made Riri feel a little sick.

"I'm worried about Mama." The Mercury senshi said miserably. "She loves me and Papa more than anything. She is the one who your sympathy should go to." She stood up her face rather blank and her demeanor serious. It wasn't a side of her that she showed very often on the Moon. In some ways she couldn't wait to visit Mercury again. She'd be able to see how her beloved Mama was holding up and talk to the Mercury regent. Maybe that would help her work her feelings out. He always made her feel calmer with his rational words. Not only that, but he was kind as well. He'd understand her feelings instantly. He was one of the most loyal vassals of Mercury and he had cared for her father a great deal.

But at the same time she was scared to go back. For everything to become reality. It was much the same as how she felt about the senshi. She loved them and she wanted to tell them when everything hurt. But... If she did she'd make them sad. They shouldn't have to worry about her. They had enough worries. She didn't want to be one of them. "Still... Serenity is Princess... She's busy." She whispered to herself.