Men! Women! Listen! Kujo and his army are rising up! We need to stop them and his communist revolution! For the glory of our economy! Come! Join VMX and I! Kujo must be dealt with quickly and swiftly! All who are with us, say Aye!

Neh!

Oy...

Vince! That counts as an Aye! Woo hoo! My first recruit. Vince, you will be promoted!

What?

*Beats you in the head with a stick*

*grabs stick* You'll get it back at the end of the day young man.

*Pulls out two sticks*
*Evil grin*

*Lights a match* Hehe...BURN!

...

What?

I'm very random.

*Sees fire*
*Looks at sticks*
*drops sticks*
*Pulls out spork*
BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!1+SHIFT!eLEVENTY-ONE!!!!!!!

AH! NOT A SPORK! IT'LL DESTROY US ALL!

foolish foolish mike...i do this for the granduer of the lord kalifla! you rebels should be ashamed of yourself! join me and serve under our lord and thee shall fall with the likes of mike! a heathen among those who seek to be good! i implore thee! do you wish to deny lord kalifla the greatness she is do! i pity you...i really do...becouse if you do not join us, you betray our lord

AAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLRIGHTY THEN!

What benefits do your respective sides offer? I still haven't decided whom I'd like to join.

well being if you join us you do not face bloody death and you reeive the privlage to do the bidding of the great kalifla, is that not enough?

Can I blow shit up?

i'll even lend you my explosives

Say hello to your new errand boy.

Booyaka!

MASTER I SHALL WORSHIP YOU AS IF YOU WERE A GOD!

Spoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooorks of dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooooooooooooo*breathe*oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooo*takes a pee break*oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooomah!
*Passes out*

*drags uziel's unconscious form away and buries it where no one will ever find it*

*Finds it, hacks it into pieces and reburies it*

as long as no one sexually violates it

u ideeuts! tah twuz my clone bob! Now giv meh bkca mah sropk!

Oh. *walks away wisteling*

Just remember, everyone! War isn't about who's right.

It's about who's left.

Unless you're an American liberal.

Actually if you're a Republican it's about how many people you nuke the shit out of.

If you're liberal...meh I don't give a shit. I'm neither really, I feel that people should be able to say pretty much whatever they want and not get bitched at by government for saying the word fuck.

Vince, when was the last time we used nukes?

When we did.

Fine: Bomb the shit out of.

Theeeere we go^^

...all right, who spiked the punch?

*walks away wistling again*

MY BRAIN IS BLEEDING ORANGE JUICE!
No, that's just earwax.

Please! Listen to me! Once Kujo gains power he will place bans on all maple syrup and candy! Even chocolate won't be safe! We have to strike him down!

I have terrible news...... I have gotten wind of a new government Kujo has started.... it will be a totalitarian dictatorship. I have received this from a VERY reliable source. If you wish this upon your great planet, very well. But I will NOT give in to this heresy!

The government will be called Kuvoji. And of course, led by Kujo. This is a travesty and must be dealt with now!

Mmm...Chocolate covered nuclear missiles...

::cough::wheeze:: I....have...been....betrayed.... VMX....has....plotted my..... assassination..... I..... can.....fight....no.....longer..... good......bye.....