GHOSTRIFFERS!

If there's something bad
In the fan fic world…
Who ya gonna call?
GHOSTRIFFERS!

If there's a terrible fic
And it has misspelled words…
Who ya gonna call?
GHOSTRIFFERS!

We ain't afraid of no fics!
We ain't afraid of no fics!

If there’re line breaks
running through the fic
Who can ya call?
GHOSTRIFFERS!

If there’s a bunch of jokes
Made about your fic…
GUESS WHO IT IS!
GHOSTRIFFERS!

*Cambot flies in to find all eight Riffers sitting on a now larger couch with a long footrest for all of them.*

Jerry: Ah, now we can read schlock and be comfortable at the same time.
Zack: It’s the only way to riff.
Brad: Damn straight.
*VincentX appears*
Lauren: So what’re we riffing on?
VincentX: Well I think it would be fun to just completely rip apart everything Barracuda Boy has done.
Mike: Barracuda Boy…I like it.
Sam: It’s catchy.
Jess: You gotta send him a message telling him to change his name to that.
Trent: Oh I’d love to see the response that message would get.
VincentX: I’ll consider it, until then, here’s your next abomination; “Hold Me When I Cry.”
Jerry: Oh god I’m scared.
VincentX: You should be, ho ho ho, you should be. It’s what Fanfiction.net has dubbed a “One Shot” meaning that it’s one chapter.
Trent: Well that’s good.
Sam: Good meaning short.
Trent: Obviously.

Disclaimer: I do not own the following: Sonic the hedgehog, Dragonball Z, Prince of Persia (the Dagger of time), Batman (the car looks like the Bat-Mobil), Pokémon (Lugia's ocarina); (I will add more when the time comes.)

Mike: Uh, you sure this isn’t part of his crossover of doom?
VincentX: It’s not…well sort of not.

Claimer: Bakuda, Dakuba, Dawn, Aura, Tara, Karnak, Adam, 'The Universal Gods', Creculo the hedge-fox and Twilight the hedge-fox I own. Bakuda was a 'spur-of-the-moment' name a friend and I created for an online game in 1999. I used the name for every game/story character ever since. If you spot anything that may be discreetly connected to another Anime/book/TV show, ECT, it is purely coincidence and not intentional.

VincentX: Then again…
Jerry: You sticking around this time?
*VincentX vanishes*
Jess: Guess not.

I do not own the following OC's: Amelia the Wolf.

Sam: Why couldn’t there be someone with the subtitle, “The Interesting Character?”
Zack: Do you really need another reason after reading his first two stories?
Sam: Point.

I only own half of the character known as 'Zephkuda' (Tournament to Test the Gods); the other half belongs to 'The-Blue-Zephyr.'

Trent: Aka a complete tard-ass for letting his crappy character be used by you.

Dedicated to the 'Angels from Above'.

Brad: Uh, is this a religious fic?
Jerry: I hope not.

The ones that 'Hold you then you cry' and 'Chases the monsters away'.

Lauren: …I’m scared.
Jess: Hold up, if they hold you and THEN you cry…wouldn’t that be a bad touch hug?
Sam: Sounds like it.

A black haired boy with a silver Kame-Senin style gi sighed as he woke up; it was a holiday that he dreaded... Mother's day.

Brad: Uh oh.
Mike: More of the woman hating I bet.

He hated this day due to his own mother being someone that tortured him whenever possible.

Trent: Yeah but you deserve it.
Sam: Wow.
Trent: You know it’s true.

Today, he was to take his brother Tails to this hall booked by Sonic and his parents.

Jerry: Take him to the Gay Bar!

Sonic and the others are meeting everyone there for that sole purpose, to spend time with their mothers.

Jess: Sonic has parents?
Jerry: Not in any of the games I’ve played.

The boy, Bakuda, got out of bed then went to the living room where Shadow and Tails waited.

Zack: So I guess this isn’t canon.
Brad: There’s a canon for his stories?
Zack: Point…in fact, let’s just shoot him out of a cannon.

Tails was dressed properly in his blue pants and jacket rather than his gi that he tended to wear; he wanted to be presentable to his 'Mother'.

Jerry: Your mother plays card games in hell!

Dawn, a completely black twin tailed Kitsune and Tails shadow was in the same room which surprised Bakuda, They made arrangements for him to go with Tails but it was still surprising to see he and Tails in the same room and not fighting each other to the death.

Mike: It would be more surprising if your fics made sense and had proper sentence structure.

Bakuda looked to Dawn and Tails; "Ready to go? And are you sure you won't come Shadow?" he asked the ebony hedgehog.

Lauren: Yeah please don’t say “come” and “ebony hedgehog” in the same sentence.

Shadow shook his head, he was watching a documentary on World War II weaponry; "Nope, Have fun." He said in a bored tone. He didn't care of holidays that didn't involve him getting anything out of it.

Jess: Wait he’s what?
Sam: Hi, that’s not creepy.

Bakuda shrugged and opened the door; "Come on guys, Amelia is waiting."

All 8: Who?

He said happily. Amelia the wolf was Tails and Dawns 'Mother' in a sense, she looked after them in a way that Bakuda nor Dakuba could ever do.

Mike: When did that happen?
Jerry: Sometime between, “I don’t care,” and “Who gives a fuck?”
Mike: Ah.

And if anyone asked who tail's parent was, he would reply with her as the answer.

Brad: Tails is stupid like that.

Dawn walked up to him before walking out with Tails; "Dakuba gets up earlier." He said bluntly. Tails scowled at him before vanishing from the void of where they called home, he was on his way to the hall.

Sam: Wait what?
Lauren: Void? Huh?

Dawn shrugged and vanished as well. Bakuda looked up with an amused expression at the thought of his shadow getting up before daybreak, it must be true. Dawn doesn't lie... does he?

Jerry: *Peter Griffin* Everything I say is a lie…except that…and that, and that, and that.

Somewhere else...

Zack: How specific.

A boy in a black gi was face down in a bed; "ZzzZzzZzzZzzzzzzzzzz... Snort! Zzz..."

Trent: Snort?
Jerry: ZORT!

Back to Bakuda...

Jess: Damn, the random sleeping character was my favorite.

Bakuda shrugged, giving up that little problem then faced where Tails and Dawn went, he wished he could go with them but torture was ahead of him and he didn't have a choice.

Mike: Wait what?
Brad: Whips?
Sam: Keep me out of the S&M stuff.

He was contacted last night by the God of Hope that every Godling must go back to their mothers for mother's day and that if they don't remember them, they will for that day.

All 8: HOW CONVEEEEEENIENT!

Bakuda tried to protest but he wasn't given a say in the matter as his fate for this day was sealed. He groaned and felt a tingling sensation come over him;

Trent: Woa, too much info there!

"Here we go... Back home and back to her..." he murmured sadly and vanished from thin air.

Brad: Please tell me he’s dead.
Lauren: Well I could say it, but it wouldn’t be true.

DBZ World

All 8: AT THE HALL OF JUSTICE!

Bakuda felt something hit his chest hard and he became dazed, he lifted his head slightly and opened his eyes.

Jess: Bakuda walked into a bar…and it hurt.
Jerry: *snicker*

What came into his sight was a quaint little home made of wood and a metal dome attached to it from the left side. Bakuda was flat on his stomach and he found that the dirt he landed on might have stained is gi but luckily it brushed off easily.

Mike: Great landing dummy.

Bakuda stood up completely and sighed, accepting his fate; "Hey, Maybe she will like me now."

Zack: No one likes you.

He thought as he went into the house quietly and turned the first corner to the kitchen. He came to face a dress of a tall woman with her black hair tied into a knot on top of her head, her red and purple dress falling to her knees and was broadened at the shoulders. Her cold onyx eyes pierced Bakuda's frightful eyes like a chisel through clay.

Lauren: YOU GONNA DIE BITCH!

Bakuda's mother, ChiChi,

Jerry: Heh, boobs.
Jess: Wait what?
Jerry: That’s what her name means.
Jess: …I’m going to hit you now.
Jerry: Figures.
*SLAP*

looked at Bakuda like he was a dropping on the carpet that the pet left.

Brad: Well at least the fic acknowledges that he’s a piece of shit.

But other than that gaze, she smiled; "Bakuda. Welcome home. Are you only here for today?" she asked with authentic disappointment of that statement in her voice.

Sam: We can only hope.

Bakuda was in shock, a smile crossed his lips and his facial expression softened; "Yeah Mom. Just today though." He explained happily. He never thought that ChiChi would like him! He always wanted to have someone that cared for him in such a manner as a mother would.

Mike: This is…kinda creepy.
Zack: Kinda?
Mike: Well I’m sure it’ll get worse but for now just kinda.

Chichi then gave a smiled that was so devious, that it washed Bakuda's smile away and replaced it with a worried look.

Jerry: Please no butt plugs.

Chichi bent down then hugged her adopted son tightly; Bakuda was thrown off by this but returned it since he thought it wouldn't last long. Once Chichi let go, Bakuda felt something tied to his neck, he looked at it with suspicion and saw it had light bulbs over it and also had little microchips on it as well.

Brad: Oh god it’s a shock collar.
Sam: KEEP ME OUT OF THE S&M STUFF FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!

Chichi held a remote in her right hand; "Now Bakuda, I expected better of you. Better than this anyway. Now let's see what happens when you slip." She said smirking and pressed the button on the middle.

Brad: Wait…was I right?

Bakuda screamed in pain as a thousand volts of electricity coursed through every vein.

Brad: I WAS RIGHT!
Trent: Holy fuck.
Jerry: I don’t what’s scarier; Brad being right or what he was right about.
Jess: Okay this fic officially turned fucking creepy.
Mike: I’m REALLY getting the feeling this guy was abused as a child.
Zack: Ya think?

He knew she would do something like this! Why did he trust her? Why? He fell to the floor on his knees and gasped for air as he felt the pain subside.

Lauren: It’s too bad you’re a completely unlikeable character or else we might feel sorry for you.
Jerry: But you suck so we’ll just chuckle.

Chichi smiled and tapped him on the head; "Yes, Kneel before me.

Trent: SON OF JOR-EL! KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!

Now Bakuda, this is the way it's going to work: You will do everything I say and if you don't, I'll use this. If you use any energy, I will find out and I will use this. Try to take it off and it will automatically shock you. Tell anyone what you are doing and you also get a shock. Got it?" she said frowning down at the boy in front of her.

Sam: Was she ANYTHING like this in the show?
Jerry: Not even close.
Sam: So this guy is just completely insane?
Jerry: Pretty much.

Bakuda only groaned in response and by not talking to her, he received another shock that sent pain surging through him. Bakuda cried on the floor as the pain ended; "Why? What did I ever do wrong? It hurts!" he thought as another jolt was sent through him and causing the boy to cry out in pain.

All 8: HAHAHAHA!
Zack: You know this is creepy as fuck…but we hate this character too much to do anything but just laugh.

Chichi snarled; "Answer me!" she demanded and her finger lingered over the button again.

Jess: SAY MY NAME BITCH!
Jerry: Get on your knees and bark like a dog!
Brad: Keep your pimp collar strong!
Trent: Shock that bitch!

Bakuda snapped his head up, his eyes full of tears and fright; "Y-Yes mam." He said quickly. Chichi smiled and put her finger away from the button but grabbed a list of items.

Sam: God I hope that isn’t a list of bondage toys.

"Good. Now you will acquire these things for me." She instructed and tossed him the list; "Every hour that passes, I will press this button. Your time starts now." She said smirking evilly. Bakuda rushed out of the house as fast as he could while clutching the list in his right hand as he fled, tears rolling down his face and spraying on to the dirt as he ran.

Mike: What? How do you spray tears?
Zack: I have no idea.

Half an hour later, Bakuda was reading the list. Chichi didn't give him any money for the items and he didn't have any on him so he would have to either steal or work for them. He had to get clothes for her, Food for the family for dinner and get some study books from the library.

Lauren: I bet he gets her a dominatrix outfit.
Jerry: Or an Ivy costume.
Lauren: There’s a difference?

He had his sword to carry the items so he didn't have to worry about that but getting them in the first place was going to be a pain. The list specified that the books be bought instead of borrowed from the library so he headed for a bookstore first.

Mike: What is the point of this?
Trent: I don’t think we want to know.

He tried to hide the collar around his neck as he went in and got all the books specified in the list. He wondered how his brother could read this stuff since he couldn't understand a word!

Brad: Well you are a complete tard.

He gathered them all into a pile and checked to see if no one was around. Seeing no one was looking at him, he placed his sword against the books and they became absorbed into them. He was pleased with himself but it was soon seen as an empty victory as he was chased through the store by security guards. No ONE had seen him steal the books, but the camera did.

All 8: HAH, HAH!

Bakuda lunged out the door and started running for his life, he heard a deafening bang and pain went right through his body but originated from his right arm.

Sam: Woa, woa…they SHOT him for stealing books?
Zack: Well does anyone really need a reason to shoot this character?
Sam: …Point.

He skidded out of sight and when he was sure he lost them, he took a glance at his arm which was bleeding profusely; "He shot me... THAT GUY SHOT MY ARM!" he thought in pain as he clutched it again.

Jerry: Are you the guy from Austin Powers now?

He was not to use energy or he would be shocked, but if he did then he could have dodged the bullet since he would be moving too fast.

Lauren: And we needed to know that why?
Jess: Gotta pad it out as much as possible I guess.

He gripped it tightly and continued on his way, he needed to get the other items on the list ChiChi had given him; "I wonder how long it's been? I get shocked ever ho-AGHHHHHHH!" he screamed in pain as he felt the collar on his neck emit hundreds of pain inducing waves through his body, he clutched his arm tighter as he seen more blood pour from the wound by the sudden attack on his body. After it was finished, his gi and hair was very hot and the ends were frizzing with electricity.

All 8: HAHAHAHAHA!
Sam: What a shocker!

He grimaced but moved to his next objective of getting clothes. He had no idea on what clothes to get but had an idea 'where' to get them.

Brad: Please be Victoria’s Secret.

He passed a nearby 'City Mission' shop and peered in,

Brad: DAMN!

there was clothes there that were free for the taking if you wanted. He went in and grabbed the best clothes he could find yet felt guilty since they were supposed to be for the homeless yet he was doing it because his mother forced him too. He put the clothes away and walked out without any troubles; "That wasn't so bad. Where do I go n-Omph!" he let out as he was punched in the gut.

Sam: Gut reaction?

An older kid was standing over him with a baseball bat and a smug look on his face, with one swing he hit Bakuda in the face and sent him toppling into an alleyway beside the store he just exited.

All 8: HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sam: Batter up!
Lauren: You’re gonna be doing that for the rest of the fic aren’t you?
Sam: Oh yes.

Bakuda knew this kids agenda, to beat him up because he looked homeless from going into that shop. He smirked; "I'm tougher than I look Kid!" He thought with a bloody nose from the hit on the nose but realised if he used a fraction of his strength over this kid, he would get shocked. He tried it all the same and the result was unwelcome.

Zack: Please get hit again.

"OWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" Bakuda cried in pain as the collar shocked him so brutally that he had lost consciousness, the kid looked at Bakuda with fear, having no clue what happened so he ran out of the alleyway as fast as he could, thinking Bakuda was dead.

Sam: Well that killed that fight scene.

Five hours later, Bakuda woke. His body was singed from shocks he received while he was in his sub-conscious state. His hair was singed and his own clothing was fried and even smoking!

Jerry: *Mask* SSSSSSSSSMOKIN!

He got up painfully and grasped his arm in pain as he felt the bullet wound sting. His left leg was now numb from the shocking but he had to keep moving. With a bloody nose, a bullet wound, a numb leg and a singed and bruised body... He still moved on.

Mike: Wow, what the hell?
Sam: He must be pretty beat.

He came outside a basic KFC store and looked in, he had no money but he had to try.

Trent: Why would anyone voluntarily get KFC?
Brad: They need to evacuate what’s in their stomach?

He walked in painfully and went up to the girl behind the desk; "Excuse me? I need a family meal but I don't have any money... Can I work in the kitchens or something?" he pleaded in a begging tone.

Jerry: Please tell me they throw him in the fryer.
Other 7: HAHAHAHAHA!
Jess: Kentucky Fried Bakuda!

The girl grew wide eyed at not only the request, but the state of the boy she was serving; "I'm sorry. We are about to close and no money means no food." She said defiantly, but she felt sympathy for the sorry excuse for a kid in front of her.

All 8: HAH HAH!

Bakuda felt tears rise to his eyes as he heard the response she gave, he had failed... He wandered out and sat on the curb of the street, he would go back to the other world soon but there were two more 'shocking' events involved before then but he just decided to wait until it was over. As he sat down however, the second last shock was sent through his body, part of his clothing began smoking as Bakuda fell onto the ground crying. No matter how good he tried to be, he couldn't get out of the situation placed on him.

Zack: Sucks to be you, but that’s what you get for being the worst character ever created in the history of ever.

The girl behind the counter had seen what had happened to the poor boy and had even laid eyes on the collar around his neck. She was in total shock and decided to do something that could get her fired just for the sake of a total stranger.

Lauren: Don’t HELP him!

Bakuda looked to his left because he heard a soft noise; he looked at it and saw a bucket full of chicken in a bag with a twenty dollar note attached. He glanced back and saw the girl smiling at him from behind the counter of the take-away franchise. Bakuda gave a weak smile and grabbed it. He hailed a taxi the next moment and used the twenty dollar note to get back to the house with a slight smile on his face; he never thought someone would help him like this...

Brad: Sun even shines on a dog’s ass some days.

The manager walked up from behind the girl; "Did I see you give that boy a free meal?" she said angrily; "Give me an explanation NOW or you're FIRED!" she yelled at her.

Jerry: *Vince McMahon* YOU’RE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEED!

The girl didn't even flinch during the screaming; "Are you a Mom or a Mother?" she asked her own question rather calmly.

Mike: What?
Trent: Mother fucker.

The manager was confused and about to yell that she was fired when it became stuck in her throat, she just couldn't say it... She thought of her own two kids at home then at the boy that was given a free meal. She instead saw her own kids asking for food and seeing them being denied and tortured like that. She thought the act of kindness the employee had just shown was something she might have done in her shoes... only a true mom.

Jerry: I’m gonna puke.

The manager smiled; "Remind me to give you a raise." She said walking away quietly.

Mike: Oh fuck you.

With Bakuda

Lauren: At the Hall of Dumbasses!

Bakuda climbed out of the cab and ran to the door; he wore a happy grin on his face as he knocked the opened the door as seeing it was always unlocked. He went in and placed the books, clothes and the KFC onto the table just as Chichi walked in. Chichi stared at him and the items she requested then made a huge grin; "Nice work Bakuda, Now for your reward." She said slyly and grabbed the remote and turned it to maximum value.

All 8: COOK HIM!

Bakuda gasped in realisation but fell immediately to the ground and screaming in pain, his hair was straight up and was smoking, threatening to catch fire. His skin was becoming red from the misuse it was constantly being put through as well as his Gi bursting open from the current. When it had stopped, Bakuda couldn't move at all, he just cried on the floor where his head lay. He knew he would head back soon, he had to!

Sam: What an electrifying day!

Chichi bent down to Bakuda and chuckled; "Now Bakuda, I want you to do one last thing... NEVER COME BACK!" she screeched and kicked Bakuda in the side, causing the boy to flip over and cry out in pain since his skin was so sensitive from the shock he received.

Brad: I love this fic!
Jerry: It’s awesome!
Lauren: God we’re sick…but yeah, I love this one too!

Chichi growled; "Never darken our doorstep again, you are worthless, you are a mindless brute and also a pathetic sight. Neither Goku nor Gohan remember you so just give up and die. You have tortured this family enough with your presence. YOU'RE BETTER OFF DEAD! Get going!" she yelled and was about to kick him again but Bakuda vanished from that spot before it made contact.

Sam: Well he sure got a kick out of that!
Trent: Hahahah! Best, fic, EVER!

Sonic's World

Jerry: IN THIS WORLD!
Other 7: HIS WORLD!

Bakuda tried to walk back, his wounds and shocked body was killing him when he moved but he had to get to the hall where Tails was so he could rest. He knew nothing good could come from going to his so called mother but since he had no choice, he had to suffer all those alone and heartbroken.

All 8: HAHAHAHA! WE LOVE IT!

He walked along the road slowly as he dragged his numb left leg and clutched his bleeding right arm as he made his way forward. It was getting to night and he saw little people outside but when he did see people… they were kids and their mothers…

Jerry: *Animal* MAMAAAA! Mama? Mamaaaa! Mama Mama Mama!

A little raccoon in the park ran up to his mother with an upset look, the raccoon lifted up a finger that was bleeding and he was crying. The mother took one look at it before slipping a band-aid on it and 'Kissing it better'. The raccoon smiled and hugged her. Bakuda looked down in sorrow and began to chant his feelings out.

Lauren: Oh no, you are not singing.
Mike: Oh god no.

I want a mom that will last forever
I want a mom to make it all better
I want a mom that will last forever
I want a mom who love me whatever

Sam: Whatever man.

He came across a group of older kids picking on a small girl, he grew enraged at the act and went to help but an adult woman sped over before he could move and scolded the kids. She also consoled the little child crying with a hug. At this point, Bakuda felt his emotions swell and his broken heart begin to be clutched with a cold hand.

Zack: DIE OF SORROW!
Trent: SLIT YOUR WRISTS!

I want a mom to take my hand
and make me feel like a holiday
A mom to tuck me in at night
and chase the monsters away
I want a mom to read me stories
and sing me a lullaby
And if I get scared at night, to hold me when I cry

Brad: Is this a real song?
Jess: I don’t think songs this bad exist.
Jerry: Hmm, must be a Lady Gaga song then.

When Bakuda came across a mother handing her child a hotdog from a stand, his stomach ached but it hurt more than usual since he wasn't hungry for food…

All 8: HE WAS HUNGRY FOR LOVE!

Oh, I want a mom that will last forever
I want a mom to make it all better
I want a mom that will last forever
I want a mom that will love me whatever, forever

Mike: Whatever man.

The same child with a hotdog nearly ran onto the road and nearly got ran over by a car when the mother that was with him grasped his hand and walked him across safely, she didn't get angry at him or anything and only saved him and taught him basic safety.

Sam: Oh that’s bullshit.

And when she says to me, that she'll always be there
To watch and protect me, I don't have to be scared
and when she says I love you,
I know it would be true

Jess: What is up with this horrible song?
Trent: What is this, a pussified version of Evanescence?

Bakuda was now feeling tears come to his eyes, he looked left and through a window, he saw a mother holding a small boy that was crying in bed. The boy had a nightmare and the mother was holding him while he let his fears out and became warm in the safety of his mothers embrace

Mike: This fic is a nightmare.
Brad: I have no idea what this is, but I’m still laughing about him getting his ass kicked.

I want a mom when I get lonely, to take the time to play
A mom who can be a friend and find a rainbow when it's gray

Zack: God this song is GAY.

I want a mom to read me stories and sing a lullaby
And if I have a nightmare, to hold me when I cry

Trent: Oh just shut up and DIE.

Bakuda couldn't take it anymore; he began running as fast as he could with what his injured leg could take him. He was nearing the hall that they were supposed to meet with his eyes clouded in tears that were cascading down his face.

Lauren: Oh suck it up.

I want a mom that will last forever
I want a mom to make it all better
I want a mom that will last forever
I want a mom who love me whatever, forever

All 8: Whatever dude.

He was right around the corner when he stumbled and fell to the ground, scratching his face. He sat up into a sitting position and his tears fell to the ground. Why didn't he have a mother to look after him? To kiss a small cut better so it didn't sting, to give him food when he was hungry and most importantly… to hold him when he cried?

Jerry: *Abridged Marik* I suppose there’s only one thing left to do.
Trent: *Abridged Bakura* Right…doo doo doo, doooo! Doo, doo, doo, doooo! Doo, doo, doo, doooo! Doo, doo, doo, doooo! Doo, doo, doo, doooo! Doo, doo, doo, doooo!
Jerry: *Abridged Marik* When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we'll see
No I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

And Bakura, Bakura
Stand by me, oh, stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me,
Stand by me.

If the sky that we look upon
Should tumble and fall
Or the mountains should crumble to the sea
I won't cry, I won't cry!
No I won't shed a tear
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

And Bakura, Bakura
Stand by me, oh, stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me,
Stand by me.

You’re way too beautiful girls,
That’s why it will never work
You’ll have me suicidal, suicidal
When you say…

Trent: *Abridged Bakura* Marik that’s the wrong song!

Jerry: *Abridged Marik* Oh right!
Stand by me, oh, stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me,
Stand by me.

I command you to
Stand by me, oh, stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me,
Stand by me.

Come on just
Stand by me, oh, stand by me
Oh stand, stand by me,
Stand by me.

Other 6: HAHAHAHAHA!

He started bawling at the top of his lungs; "I WANT MY MOMMY!" he yelled in anguish, his emotions rising to the surface and taking over. All his strength and courage, as well as his honour was nothing to his need to be loved by someone he could truly call a mom. To feel proud of him as he grew, he may be strong… but he is still a kid.

Brad: That song just killed it for me.
Sam: It was great but now we have nothing left! Hahahaha!

I just want a Mom...

Lauren: I want candy!
Jess: I want candy!

With Amelia

Mike: Earhart?

A long silver haired wolf with a tied ponytail held by a blue bow was standing outside the hall; you could hear dancing from the inside of the hall which is why she was out.

Sam: Of the closet?
Brad: Nah, only the guys are gay in this guy’s fics.

She needed some fresh air. She had blue eyes, a bluish grey mussel bushy tail, wore a sky blue tunic, a white sash on her torso and brown boots. She suddenly heard a shout that drew her attention just around the corner; she raised an eyebrow at the yelled and walked around to investigate but didn't expect to see Bakuda there!

All 8: DUN DUN DUN!

He was wounded, tired, crying, dirty, nearly naked from the torn gi, singed hair and that was only on the outside. She knew Bakuda was suffering in his heart due to the full droplets of salty tears cascading down his face.

Jess: EMOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Bakuda saw Amelia and tried to contain himself; "Amelia?" he asked still sobbing. Amelia walked over and crouched next to him.

Jerry: Wait, let me guess, “Are you okay!?”

"Shh, Calm down. What happened? You look like hell!"

Jerry: Dammit!

she cried in worry, she immediately tore off a bit of her sleeve as she saw the bullet wound on his arm and tied it around to stop the blood flow.

Lauren: Because I’m sure a tiny bit of cloth will stop a bullet wound from bleeding.

Bakuda cringed as the wound was covered and tightened; "My mother put this collar on me that chocked me if I didn't do what she said.

Trent: Remove the “h” in the misspelled “choked” and you’ll get what Bakuda does to Tails every night.
Zack: ZING!

If I tried to get it off, she would shock me harder.

Brad: Wow, that sounds really dirty out of context.

I did all this stuff for her and got shot, shocked, beat up, shocked again, humiliated, chased, shocked again, abused by a taxi driver for getting blood on his seat and the shocked a final time when I gave her the stuff.

Jerry: And we loved every second of it!

She said everyone had forgotten me and that i-i-i... I was better off dead!"

Jess: But…you are.

he said hurriedly, letting all his emotions out and crying over her shoulder. Amelia was surprised at the cruelty Bakuda was put through by this woman, even shocking him when he gave her the stuff she asked for was as dirty as you could get in her books but it just got raised higher when she heard Bakuda was told he was better off DEAD!

Trent: But…he is.

She scowled but hugged Bakuda, rubbing his back and telling him that he was safe now and everything would be okay. She held him when he cried all over her shoulder and retold what he was forced to do. Amelia'[s rage boiled so much she just had to do something; "Bakuda? Can I see your Dragonball of Hope?" she asked. Bakuda nodded then dug a golden four star ball from his torn gi.

Jerry: NOW BEAT HIM TO DEATH WITH IT SO WE CAN GET A HAPPY ENDING!

Amelia took it then helped him up; "Go on, get inside and get some rest, I'll be in shortly." She said softly and helped him inside; she felt sorry for him and would help him as soon as a small matter was dealt with. She grasped the ball,

Brad and Zack: KINKY!

she knew it took a lot of energy for these to work without the other six but she felt like she had to try; "Shenron, I beg of you to grant me this one wish. Please... Allow me to make things right." She said softly and held the ball aloft.

Mike: But, everything is right.

Nothing happened, the ball didn't shine nor did it do anything for that matter, Amelia was crestfallen; "Oh well... It was worth a try. All I wanted to do was teach Bakuda's 'Mother' some manners!" she seethed and something caught her eye, the Dragonball was gleaming. She stared at it then smiled, looks like the Dragonball approved of this wish...

Sam: Because violence solves everything I guess.
Lauren: I don’t care what the fic says, Chi Chi is the real hero to us.

DBZ World.

Jerry: AT THE HALL OF JUSTICE!

Chichi was serving chicken onto plates, she expected Goku home at any moment when she felt a tap on her shoulder, she turned around and came face to face with a obviously angry wolf; "What the? Who are you and what are you doing in my house?" she screeched.

Brad: What the fuck you think you doing!?
Zack: Who you think you are!?

The wolf chuckled darkly; "I am Amelia, you may be Bakuda's mother... But I am his Mom! Happy Mother Day!" she yelled and the last thing Chichi saw that evening was the flash of knuckles right between her eyes.

Mike: Wait…what?
Jerry: Why did you attack the only character we liked?

I had the urge to do this one. Don't ask me why but I did.

Sam: I don’t think we want to know why.

Hope you liked it!

Trent: Oh we did, just not for the reasons you wanted us to.
Brad: You know; I’m curious about the reviews for this.
Jess: Then let’s check them out.
Zack: There are eleven reviews, let’s start with the earliest and work our way up.
Lauren: Sounds good.

“That was pretty cool. I sorta hate Chichi more than I used to now.”

Jerry: I like her now.

“Last parts funny, but from the DBZ i've seen (and i actually saw quite a bit in the days when it was still on TV) Chichi wasnt great, but she wasnt that cruel...”

Sam: Yeah we pointed that out too.

“Dawn you Liar!
And, man! ChiChi's crazyingly EVIL in this oneshot! You didn't even make her that evil in Rise of the Saiyan God! I was hoping Gohan would come out of nowhere and kick the remote out of her hand, but I know better than that.
Anyway, I wonder what'll happen on Father's Day... IF you decide to do a oneshot on Father's day...”

Zack: I bet it involves gay things.
Trent: With this guy that’s not a bet, that’s a certainty.

“CHICHI! YOU EFFING IDIOT! *throws a beating at her* MUDAMUMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA! THIS IS ZA WARUDO! *time stops* Toki Wo Tomare! *Throws a million knives at her* Soshite ito goki desu *gets hit by all the knives*... ROADA ROLLERA DA! *Smashes a Steam Road roller at her then poses on top of it* WRY!”

Brad: Woa what the fuck!?
Sam: Wow, that’s crazier than the fic. What the hell?
Mike: Well at least we know who his core audience is.
Jerry: Yeah, 4chan members.

“This is and awesome oneshot especially the KFC part. It really hit my soft side.”

Jess: Wow, this guy is insane.

“Great story!

It was good! The song was cute too!

I felt sorry for Bakuda.Chichi was so cruel to him.

The part with the KFC employee giving Bakuda a free meal was touching.I cried.

Amelia sure did teach her a leason.

Speaking of which,Amelia was great in this!

Keep up the good work!”

Trent: That’s one review…was this person talking to herself?
Lauren: It kinda looks like it.

“man great job it had me in tears the whole time poor Bakuda all he wants is a mom who will love him”

Zack: Oh we were in tears too…because we were laughing so hard.

“dude I thought chaos had it worst this was good.”

Jess: Chaos? What fic were you reading?

“Chichi rememds me of the mother in the Boy called it.”

Mike: I don’t even want to know.

“That was a pretty sad story... I'm inspired to do one now. Of course, I can't yet... But I will when the time comes.”

Sam: Okay that makes no sense.

“My floor is now flooded with the tears that I shed from this story. Nicely written.”

Jerry: Why? Were you laughing too?

“now if you'll excuse me, I need to hurt ChiChi now. I'll be back. *holds orb over head and vanishes*”

Trent: Random.

“ok i now Hate Chi Chi with every fiber of my being”

Zack: That’s funny, we love her.
Brad: And that’s it.
VincentX: I am so posting a review saying how I enjoyed reading about Bakuda getting abused.
All 8: DO IT!