I know I came in second place in the Civil Ware Challenge, but this was my first ever RP as Caden. I've never wrote as a deranged person, which is why I created Caden to go out of my comfort zone. So I'm curious about what you guys thought about my RP. What did you like? What didn't you like? What should I do in the future to build off this? I'm just really curious on you guys' opinion.
It was pretty cool, good rp but I thought the character interaction felt a little forced to me and unnatural. I also don't think I even caught a glimmer of him being deranged until you mentioned it in this thread, wouldn't have known until you'd said so.
Considering I've written my share of deranged characters over the years, the only real advice I can give on writing someone like that is just don't try to force it. It'd be like a handler who isn't that good at dialog trying to write for a charismatic guy like The Rock.
Maybe try and take a look at Cactus Jack's anti-hardcore promos from ECW or early Mankind because Foley's always at his best as a heel and those were the high points of his career in my opinion. True derangement.
Most of all, it's all on you too. Whatever you think will work is the best thing to go for because we all have our own views on stuff so going by someone else's opinions or trying to copy someone else just falls flat every time and never works out. Just ask my short-lived white rapper character from 2004 lol
| QUOTE (Dazz @ Feb 18 2012, 04:59 PM) |
It was pretty cool, good rp but I thought the character interaction felt a little forced to me and unnatural. I also don't think I even caught a glimmer of him being deranged until you mentioned it in this thread, wouldn't have known until you'd said so.
Considering I've written my share of deranged characters over the years, the only real advice I can give on writing someone like that is just don't try to force it. It'd be like a handler who isn't that good at dialog trying to write for a charismatic guy like The Rock.
Maybe try and take a look at Cactus Jack's anti-hardcore promos from ECW or early Mankind because Foley's always at his best as a heel and those were the high points of his career in my opinion. True derangement.
Most of all, it's all on you too. Whatever you think will work is the best thing to go for because we all have our own views on stuff so going by someone else's opinions or trying to copy someone else just falls flat every time and never works out. Just ask my short-lived white rapper character from 2004 lol |
Well with Caden the guy I've been listening to is his picbase Jon Moxley(or Dean Ambrose in FCW). Moxley's character is really dynamic and I've tried to take some of that mixed in with other stuff. Being a high school student I read a lot of Shakespeare, Keats, Wordsworth so I've been adding that to him.
But yeah this first one really doesn't show how deranged he is merely because it was his debut and nothing has really happen yet(like a feud) so that side of him will come eventually. This one was just suppose to show how he views things and it's suppose to be more vulgar in some parts but yeah thanks again dude for the feedback :)
You're welcome, that's one thing I forgot to add, that it takes time.
